The three lives of Jeannette

From a childhood without electricity, Jeannette subsequently saw and adopted all technologies. In the space of a lifetime, his conversations will go from a horn phone to those on Facetime and other Skype. At the same time, her life will take some detours so big that I feel like my grandmother lived three lives in one.

Jeannette, my mother's mother, was born in the countryside of eastern Ontario in August 1934. Ten years later, the arrival of the telephone in her family home was a real technological revolution. But it was necessary to share the innovation with the neighbors, connected on the same line. The heavy device hanging on the kitchen wall would sound a different number of rings depending on the house for which the call was intended. Two shots at the Bertrand's and little Jeannette. One, three, or more for the Laviolette or the Péladeau. Five houses shared the same connection and each had to wait to be certain of the number of rings before picking up the large horn receiver.

It was especially after the death of her daughter - my mother - a few years ago that I got closer to my grandmother. But it wasn't until recently that I realized that I knew almost nothing about his childhood. And that if I had spent my last few years asking questions of hundreds of people around the globe, I hadn't done it with her yet.

Sitting with my Amigo MAM, as I nicely call it since I was a child, so I started taking notes. To his amazement.

“I'm not like you,” she said to me, “I have no stories to tell, me”.

Oh Amigo MAMI tell myself, starting to realize it, but your whole life is a story!

My grandmother Jeannette today, photographed in her vegetable garden.

1st life: childhood

As Jeannette delves into her childhood memories, I have the impression of watching Caleb's Daughters under my eyes.

“I took the Carrière dogsled to go to school in the winter… I did my homework by the light of an oil lamp. Then propane which should not be touched when it was hot because it could burst… We had electricity at the house when I was 12 years old. "

In this era of "the old days", Jeannette's mother is the one who instilled the first feminist values ​​in her daughters, and her boys. To all of them, she taught them the importance of being independent. My great-grandmother Marie-Ange then did some sewing work for which she was getting paid. And she kept these amounts a secret. “Your father doesn't have to know how much I have in my bank account. She said to her children.

Little Jeannette, with a hateful look, pointed in blue pencil at an old photograph.

My grandmother, long before she was my grandmother, along with her two older sisters.

Years have passed and I learn that Jeannette has skipped two years of school: her 2nd and 10th. “The only subject that was more difficult was Latin in grade 11. », Adds my grandmother. A bit normal considering that she had just jumped directly over Latin 1, taught in 10th grade. Then she went to university where she did a year at "normal school", as the Faculty of Education was then called. At 18, she became a teacher.

As a teacher, she led all primary levels at the same time in a very small row school. One of the older students, "little Bougie", was not much younger than her. Yet he constantly disturbed the rest of the students, so as to attract the attention of his young and pretty schoolmistress. Jeannette therefore had to explain to him one day that their relationship would never go further than only professional. She nevertheless unofficially appointed him assistant professor. This would have the effect of transforming him overnight into a model student!

2nd life: marriage

At the same time, Jeannette met Robert, who would become her husband the following year. The marriage takes place even before its twentieth birthday.

She then continued to teach for a few years. But from the moment my mother was born, she stayed at home to take care of her. In the village of L'Orignal in the 50s, a woman did not work if she had children. Even though she was only in her early twenties.

“I didn't know anything when Diane was born,” Jeannette tells me. I was 21, and this is the book of Dr spock about raising children that has helped me the most. "

It is this part of her life that my grandmother is least talkative about. Probably the one where she was the least fulfilled too.

After a few years of marriage, her husband becomes more possessive. My bubbly grandmother tells me that she has become more withdrawn. Then she was bored at home. She started by accepting replacement work, and then went door to door for the Federal Bureau of Statistics when her two children were in school. Even if it means then having to justify his comings and goings and his conversations.

Barely 19 years old, at Christmas 1953, a few months before her wedding, Jeannette (2nd in the picture) has nothing to envy the look of Hollywood actresses.

Penultimate pictured, a hockey player. Early thirties, around 1967.

Some passages of this life nevertheless make my mother's mother smile. Like that hockey game around 1967, where the mothers of young players competed on the ice in a tournament in Toronto.

“Were you good at hockey ?! », Which I ask her completely stunned when she admits to me having scored several goals that day. I can hardly imagine my grandmother skating and fighting for a puck. In fact, it is often difficult to imagine a grandmother to be anything other than a grandmother.

She laughs a little. " No ! I was bad! But all the other women were even more so! "

She then remembers her many visits that same year to the great universal exhibition in Montreal.

“I have visited all the kiosks in the countries several times. It was the first time that we saw all these cultures together. I particularly remember jewelry from Tunisia made with silver filaments. "

Perhaps it was this exhibition that made him want to go back to school. Probably more his curious character which resurfaced.

Jeannette thus registered for courses at the University of Ottawa. She followed some of these by correspondence, others at a local school that served as a regional campus. For several years she thus accumulated enough credits to obtain a bachelor's degree in psychology. At the end of her forties, she completed her last session in the summer by renting an apartment in Hull (as this part of Gatineau was then called).

A few months later, she filed for divorce.

3rd life: rebirth

The decision to separate had been made and kept secret for many years. These studies were part of the plan. Back then, a divorced woman usually found herself without means. In addition to the greater stigma, the law did not include a partition of the family patrimony. Then for personal reasons, Jeannette wanted to wait for her daughter's marriage before separating. To be able to offer him the most beautiful day without any hassle.

Diploma in hand and married girl, the federal law was modernized then at the same time. Jeannette could therefore leave without risking finding herself on the street.

"So you were about 50 years old?" », Which I ask him. “I left on April 26, at age 49. She recalls precisely. His memory of 85 years is not lacking.

She then lived for 2 years in Hawkesbury, 10 minutes from her former life. Then she moved to the Laurentians, where she still lives. First in Val-David, then in Ste-Adèle. "I took possession of my house on June 9, 1987, and I lived there until October 29, 2013.", she remembers once again with astonishing precision. She adds with a touch of nostalgia that “it was a memorable day for me in this house. I really enjoyed having my family and friends there. ".

In front of his house in Sainte-Adèle in the Laurentians.

I really have the impression that for this third life, Jeannette had completely regained control of all her decisions.

She began to paint. His landscapes taking on more and more detail and confidence as the flowers were added to his house, his life and his paintings.

She also began to travel. With friends, her sister or her brother, she went to Brazil and Costa Rica in the early 1990s, long before these destinations became known. She rented a car in Europe before traveling from Portugal to Germany via Spain, France and Italy. She meandered through Romania and Bulgaria, sailed on a sailboat in the Mediterranean near Greece.

But beyond these destinations ticked off on an atlas, this Jeannette was able to give free rein to her curiosity. She began to read about international politics, about the history and geography of countries, about technological advances. It is this woman that I knew and that I love.

She and I are fluent in these new technologies. Especially since we usually communicate by Facetime calls since my extended absences from Canada in recent years. These tech conversations range from Windows updates on his laptop to space research. "It's possible to talk to those who orbit the Earth, isn't that wonderful ?! She enthuses.

The Internet is, according to her, the technological change that has affected her the most.

“You can learn so much about any subject with the Internet. Like the meaning of a word without a dictionary. I still keep my dictionary in memory of the times I read it. "

Sometimes we talk about the immense technological leap that has taken place in its sole existence. "What do you think it will be when I'm old myself?" I ask him. "You're probably going to go for a walk on the Moon like in another country." Maybe on Mars… but I'm not sure. She remains cautious in her extrapolations all the same!

Today, my dear grandmother Jeannette wears a hearing aid, has difficulty seeing, and has to walk around her house like the grocery store with her magnifying glass to help her. But she continues to adapt and keep her liveliness. At over 85, she has just started dictating a fiction book on a new iPad that she got specifically for this project!

The sun being more present at her residence than on the wooded land of her old house, she has also discovered a new passion for gardening in her vegetable garden. She also walks the path behind her house, watches the majestic cliff face constantly changing color behind her living room, and continues to see the positives in everything she has. Always independent as her mother taught her, she tells me that she is fulfilled in her old age.

Age is in my head, although my grandmother expects to be "officially old at 90." " In 5 years.

“Sometimes I imagine myself at that age. I will be dressed in black, with a hat, a cane. I will have my back bent but my head held high. "

Ma Amigo MAM has never worn a hat and she tells me that dressed in a red and white sweater adorned with colorful butterflies…!

She may be keeping black for her 4th life.